Tuesday 21 February 2012

CHICAS BE LOCO

Thanks Pony for your guest blogging. Tonight's theme is Spanish, and we invited Pony over for the long awaited meeting of Lowrider. We have 4 recipes to tick off the list for tonight's dinner:
Sangria Granita from Cocina Nueva (Didn't make it to the table, don't attempt to freeze something a couple of hours before serving)
Fatayer from The Moro Cookbook
Paella from The Butcher, the Baker, the Best Coffee Maker
Chocolate con churros from Movida

¡ATMÓSPHERA! (ambience!) 
Fruits of the sea. Rich, tasty condiments. Red lipstick. A dog loving friend and guest diner recently relocated to Melbourne. One small canine in sausage casing. Shakira, red wine, touch of  Paul Simon – all effects typically Spanish (but all just probably a culturally offensive farce). Slow cook that woofy sausage and he might turn into chorizo.
¡ENTRADA! (entrée!) 
Low-rider on his mince. Said guest diner brought it along as a feeble effort to win some woofy love. Worked a treat.

Guest blogger spending about 75% of her night at chorizo level.



For the two legged-ers, there were:
¡PATATAS BRAVAS! Served with HOMEMADE AIOLI (fancied up mayonesa). Suck on it Jamie Oliver, my friend makes crispier roast potatoes than you. Student has become the master…; and 
Cava, Rosato  and Grenache kept the Spanish theme in order


















¡FATAYER! Little Cornish pastie-type things stuffed with pumpkin, feta, and some kind of herb. Guest diner who suggested playing “name that herb” was rubbish at her own game. Naïve.































¡ENTRADA ROUND DOS! (entrée round two!) 
The bottom dwelling one snuck off into the garden and had a hoon on the spring onions the tea towel maker had so lovingly planted and nurtured. This wasn’t part of the meal plan, it was just a case of dachshund be loco. Greedy sausage. Still not too late to turn you into spring onion stuffed chorizo.

¡PLATO PRINCIPAL! (move into the dining room now, this evening is getting fancy) 
There was a party on the bottom of the sea that moved onto a pan. There was no lobster on the plate, but Sebastian from the Little Mermaid clearly set up this whole affair, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-tz3SN_UF2M. Sebastian himself appears to be Jamaican, but if he got together with Marc Anthony and sang a song about this paella, it would be the new Spanish national anthem. Record companies will finally be able to get behind a meaningful cause.













 

¡POSTRE! (pudding!) 
Homemade churros. Guest diner lovingly scooped them out of the oil, patted them down with paper towels, then threw some sugar at them. It all smelt so delicious, the bottom dweller woke up briefly and made a hilarious sleepy attempt to roll his sausage carriage into the kitchen. Guest diner took the opportunity to indulge in some animal cruelty pre- postre-entrée - and tricked him into chasing his tail. By the time she was back there was a cup of custardy chocolate mixture sitting next to a pile of sugary deep fried dough. Loco got loco. Things were so delicious, they even got sexualmente atractivo. Guest diner got overwhelmed and fleetingly assessed her chances of getting some fat sex. Opportunities weren’t presenting themselves, so she went and harassed the bottom dweller some more. No means no, churro.






















¡POST-POSTRE!(post pudding!) 
Started binge drinking, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Binge_drinking, for no apparent reason. Mierda happens. No music, no salsa, but there were terse, hot blooded latino words with a taxi company operator at 3.30 in the morning. Viva l’espagne!

¡RESACA! (dirty, nasty hangover!) 
Don’t want to talk about it. Callar a la fuerze (shut your face, I’m really hungover and can’t deal with this).

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